It was mandarin class, the teacher creep in the classroom out of nowhere, and the class starts. I never had any interest in studying mandarin, so i just sat there, eyes looking at her, but my thoughts are far away, flying in the thin air of the dark and humid place.
For me, boring subject makes people doze off, i does that sometimes, but unexpectedly, i did not do it today. Every teacher that steps in our class would surely mention about our assessment paper. For them, it's UBER important to get good result for Malaysia secondary 3 assessment paper, it helps you to get into science stream.
Whenever the teacher mentioned it, i would think of everything i could ever think of. Yes, Malaysia is a "kia su" country too, not just Singapore. Because of my "kia su" thoughts, I've been to a lot of pressure. Yes, Unnecessary pressure! Why these thoughts?
(Kia su = Can't afford to lose)
Sometimes these thoughts just eats me up, swallow me up, and torn me into pieces. Pressure kills.
My English teacher told our class that she wanted to get back to the times when she was a student. She'd rather sit for exams and study. For her, as a teacher, there's stuff that she can't do in public, she can't have her own space whenever she goes. Can't enjoy life.
But i would surely want to know what's her thought if she really became a student suddenly and had to study everyday and sit for numerous exams. Will she regret? Or she'll be extremely happy with it?
It's weird you see.
My history teacher told us that some of the student turned out to be insane after the exam because they did really bad. They hold their result slip every where they go and showed it around, show the people out there, telling them, "I have bad results".
My mandarin teacher told us not to stress ourself. This assessment is just to put you either to science stream, or not. It doesn't affect much about your future. It's easy to say, hard to not think about it. It kills. Your thought kills.
The worse part is that, I'm still blogging, without touching any of my books, and next week is the exam and it cover up to secondary 1 2 3 syllabus. Fantastic huh? I wonder if i'd turn insane like everybody else.
"PMR(assessment paper) 只是人生一个小小的关卡. 以后还有更多事情需要你去操心，以后还有更多考试要你去烦恼. 别太去在意, 享受生活, 尽力就好."
My teacher :"PMR is just a small stop, a small checkpoint, and a small matter for you to think too much at this age of yours. There's more you have to face when you grow up. There's SPM, College, University, family, work, and there's more for you to worry. Do not worry too much now, enjoy life just try your best."
kthxbai.
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